Annoyed...or just making a bad choice?

I've come to the conclusion that there will always be people in your life who rub you the wrong way, or annoy you, or make you uncomfortable. No matter what circles you run in, they will be there.

Because we're all humans, and humans have that nice little characteristic called sinful nature. And so we annoy one another.

But I've also realized that annoyance doesn't come from other people's sinful nature. It comes from mine. Sometimes I get angry when people sin against me, and sometimes I get angry when they haven't done anything wrong. It doesn't really matter whether or not they were in the wrong - I can still be ruffled, see?

It's the same way with the times when I keep my cool. Sometimes people are nice to me and everything's smooth sailing. Other times they are rude, but it doesn't bother me.

The issue is me. Like it or not, I determine my own responses.

But how can one learn to control her responses? Not on my own, that's for sure. The Natural Me goes with whatever emotion springs to the surface at the time. The Natural Me listens to my body, and reacts more snappishly when I'm feeling tired or achey. The Natural Me has only one line of thought, and that's ME. It keeps track of every time my own wishes are crossed, my feelings hurt, my desires thwarted, etc., and reacts with the instincts of self preservation.

But I'm not my own! I've been bought with a price. The Natural Me isn't me anymore. Sure, she lives in the same body I do, but she's an unwelcome guest, a claim jumper, trying to pretend she still owns me. The New Amber is a dulas - a bond slave to Someone she loves very much. And that Someone has given her a new heart, which delights to do His will.

The New Amber has only one line of thought, and that's CHRIST. His wishes. His feelings. His desires. She is in tune with His law and love, and is so content in His affection that human kindness - or lack thereof - is of no consequence. Everything is Him, Him, Him.

Oh how I wish I always could live in that! No - what I mean is how I wish I always would live in that! It's a choice, because Christ has given me the power to live in newness of life. So I can....I just don't.

And that, my dears, is a terrible, awful shame.

Thank the Lord He doesn't alter based on my failures!!!!